This is Pretty Much the Creepiest Music Video In the World

2 years ago, the internet was infected with the viral non-sensation of a song, “Friday,” performed by Rebecca Black. Last month, the impresario responsible for Ms. Black, Patrice Wilson, introduced his newest protegé, Alison Gold, with a song called, “Chinese … Continue reading

Look No Further, Here’s The Biggest A-Hole in the World

Today Satan momentarily stopped 69’ing Adolf Hitler to let out a Golf clap in honor of the most unfun, humorless trick that ever hit the Halloween game. Some whore in North Dakota decided to take out her misery from living in North Dakota, on kids. … Continue reading

Tinkle Tinkle, Little Star

Every mother thinks their child is a brilliant rainbow of genius perfection, I am no exception. The difference is, I know that you don’t want to hear about it. Let’s face it, listening all about other people’s allegedly intelligent children qualifies as a … Continue reading

I’ve Never Been Happier to be OLD: The 2013 VMAs in a Nutshell

True story, I had planned to get lit up like a Christmas tree and hate-watch the MTV Video Music Awards last night. Matter of fact, I skipped sneaking my flask into a movie theatre on Saturday afternoon because I was saving … Continue reading

4th Grade Teacher Drunk For Field Trip to the Bowling Alley (Alternate Title: Who Can Blame Her?)

  Ah Summer! The weather heats up, skanks start wearing bikini tops in lieu of the more understated tube top, and of course, school’s out. It’s a known fact that every teacher in America with a Facebook account is on … Continue reading

Mom Has Son Arrested For Stealing Her Pop Tarts

America, we’ve got a new WORST MOTHER OF THE YEAR AWARD, and it goes to Latasha Renee Love, of Charlotte, North Carolina. Latasha has a 13-year-old son, and as with all teenagers, he’s been testing her nerves. But unlike every other … Continue reading

Watch This 14-Year-Old Put Eddie Van Halen Out of A Job

Whether you’re a Diamond Dave Fan or all about Van Hagar, all can agree Van Halen has had several hits. Eddie Van Halen, the evil boy king of 80’s guitar, is famous for his skilled and indulgent lengthy guitar solos. Perhaps … Continue reading

These Kids Today: Cow Wow Cereal Flavored Milk

  When it comes to leftover cereal milk, there are two types of people in this world: 1. People who savor the flavor of the cereal marinated milk, and slurp it up. OR 2. People who find it disgusting, and pour … Continue reading