Taco Bell Launches the Cool Ranch Doritos Locos Taco TODAY! (My condolences to Your Toilet)

When Taco Bell, America’s favorite diarrhea factory, released the Doritos Locos Taco last year, the world rejoiced. The nuclear orange shell proved irresistible to consumers, it was an instant hit and millions of us were left with “cheese stains” on our fingertips. … Continue reading

My Biscuits are Burning Just Looking at This

Vodka. Is there any more glorious nectar from your father’s liquor cabinet? (The correct answer is no.) In the past few years Vodka tramps like yours truly have enjoyed a delightful trend in the booze industry, the flavored Vodka boom! You … Continue reading

Post By Mad Dad: Kids Are Expensive

Kids Are Expensive I wish I could blow your mind. I don’t feel that I will. Kids are expensive. Very, very expensive. For those with, you know. For those who don’t, you only assume. And it’s not like any of … Continue reading

Choke On This (Not What it Sounds Like!)

China is laughing into their plum wine this morning, because they are truly superior to America in one area: having disgusting delicious donut flavors. But I’m getting ahead of myself… Let me start with this: Did you know that American … Continue reading