Photobombs Away!

For the past Five years, I’ve been your curator of crazy, a Nostradamus of nonsense. Yes, it’s hard to believe we’ve been sticking it to productivity for half a decade while shirking a multitude of responsibilities, but WE DID IT, USAUSAUSAUSAUSA! From … Continue reading

Holy Knit!

Okay, it’s crochet, not knitting, but what 2-bit hack blogger could resist such a title? Howdy babies! Did you miss me??? Sorry, I’ve been busy Scrooge McDucking the duck out of my biz. As you might recall, I accidentally went into … Continue reading

Charming Senior Citizens Who DGAF

My birthday is less than a month away. With the blood curdling and brutal chill of today’s weather, I am feeling each and every one of my years on Earth. But you know what? Unlike all the other whiny complaint factories who p*ss … Continue reading

Tracy Jordan Motivational Posters Are Just What You Need to Kick 2015 in the Egg Basket

Hello there, my name is Cribsy. You might recognize me from previous dispatches of foolery and world-class fart jokes on this Hobo Parlor of a website. After taking my sweet-assed time, I’ve decided to start posting again on this time-wasting journey into … Continue reading

Forget Elf on the Shelf, Say Hello to WHORE IN THE DRAWER!

Happy Monday you beautiful babies, boy do I have a SPECIAL TREAT for y’all today! Years and years ago, when I was in College, I was part of a lounge singing duet. My partner was a hilarious and devastatingly handsome … Continue reading

Hellf on the Shelf (Elves Gone Wild)

It’s been almost two months since I last filled you in on the rolling horror-show that has been 2014. For those of you Johnny-Come-Latelys too stoned from gas huffing, let me be clear, as far as my family is concerned, 2014 can … Continue reading

Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: Hilarious Wedding Announcement Names

Howdy, Pilgrim. I’ve been taking a small sabbatical from churning out the hot and cold laffs on this drunk tank of a blog. The truth is that it’s been weeks since I last updated and almost 2 months since I filled … Continue reading