They’re Bringing Back CRYSTAL PEPSI (Children of the 90’s Rejoice!)

Crystal Pepsi, AKA clear liquid nectar of the GODS, was introduced to the American Marketplace in late 1992. The crisp beverage had a wealth of marketing and advertising bucks behind it. Unfortunately, the color-free drink was ahead of its time, … Continue reading

We Tried It: Draft Beer Jelly Beans

Last Week, the Jelly Belly announced a new flavor just in time for the stupor bowl, DRAFT BEER FLAVORED BEANS. It’s pretty fitting when you think about it, because “jelly belly” is exactly what drinking too much draft beer gives … Continue reading

Don’t Mess With Texas (Or Our Sausage)

Making the internet rounds this fine morning, is an angry customer call recorded back in 2007. A Texan man named Randy Taylor called the good folks at Jimmy Dean Sausage to register a complaint, he was angry that they discontinued their … Continue reading

VELVEETA CRISIS! (Terror Threat Level: Creamy Yellow)

The End Times are here and now is the moment to panic! Sound the alarm and batten down the hatches, because sh*t’s about to get real. Kraft foods, a stalwart in the processed food game, released some pretty not-chill news yesterday: … Continue reading

Half-Ton Chocolate Santa is Amazing & Probably Delicious

Houston’s Hilton of the Americas is a great place to have a drink and skeeze on visiting businessmen, if you’re a local. For everyone else, it’s a pretty nice hotel to call home for a coupla nights while you’re in … Continue reading

The Greatest Cider Recipe in THE WORLD (Merry Christmas!)

Happy Holidays, Y’all! This is the time of year that many folks live for.   Family, friends, presents, cold weather (it’s pushing 80 here, WTF) and parties! Me? I love the Holidays, but I’m always looking to make the season … Continue reading

Thanksgiving 2013: Meanwhile, Back at the Ranch

Greetings, my dear friends. Today is perhaps one of the biggest nutkicks in the calendar year. See, it’s the Monday after the long Thanksgiving Holiday Weekend, and with the start of the Christmas Season, it seems everyone is dreaming of … Continue reading

Roasted Brussels Sprouts Taste Like All of Your Dreams Coming True

I can’t stand Brussels Sprouts. Matter of fact, they are a “drop dead” food, meaning that even if the sweetest Nana in the world made me a plate of them, my response would be, “drop dead, I’m not eating that … Continue reading

Nurse Your Candy Hangover With Something Healthy (GASP!)

Snickers, Kitkats, Skittles, Candy corn, all of these little beauties were marched unceremoniously into my mouth by the fistful last night. And while, I’ll never regret the sweet beat down I gave my pancreas last night, I’ve got a mondo … Continue reading

Ron Burgundy to Get His Own Ben & Jerry’s Flavor (Alternate Title: Knights of Columbus!)

This Christmas, Anchorman 2 premieres and while we’ve been gifted with trailers, teasers and Dodge Durango commercials, I’m HUNGRY FOR MORE RON BURGUNDY! As if an answer to my polyester prayers and rich mahogany dreams , Ben and Jerry’s Ice Cream announced … Continue reading