Folks, mark today in your books, it’s a glorious occasion. Today is the day I introduce you to what is hands down the greatest food, let alone breakfast offering in the history of taste buds. Say hello to Chica Chocolatina’s CHURRO … Continue reading
‘Tis the season of light and love. Miracles abound during the holidays, and today…this bleak and soulless Monday, I have news that will literally change the way you suffer, forever. With the party and palm pressing season in full … Continue reading
Once upon a time, January of this year to be exact, a devastatingly beautiful and hilarious writer wrote a frantic plea for an American Icon, Hostess Brand Snack cakes . In her genius piece, the writer begged readers to buy every … Continue reading
I’m about to write something I never in a million years dreamt I would ever type: “You need to go to Wal-Mart.” Look, I know…Wal-Mart is where dreams go to die. The company is solely responsible for murdering small town … Continue reading
Halloween is in less than 48 hours. While children are strategically planning how to get the MOST and BEST candy, tricks are finishing the details on their slutty costumes and boozehounds are getting ready to be blackout drunk. Me? I’m … Continue reading
Hi, my name is The Crib Keeper, and in addition to using cliché joke introductions, I’m also a real “Holiday Slut.” No, the term “Holiday Slut,” doesn’t refer to what you did on spring break all those semesters ago…I mean it … Continue reading
When I awoke this morning, I heard birds chirping a delightful song of celebration, the sun streamed on my pillow in a perfect beam of gloriousness and the world seemed in love with my being here. Then I logged on to my computing … Continue reading
Anyway you slice it, Pizza Hut is an American company. Founded in the states, the chain of questionable quality pizza pies is a brand synonymous with the good ol’ US of A. You’d think a business that was made with … Continue reading
Do you remember that band from the late 90′s/ Early 00′s, who had the fat “party dude” lead singer? I’m sorry, I’ll be more specific… ‘Memba, Smashmouth? Liars. Of course you do. I mean who here will ever be able to scour … Continue reading
Satan Claus is laughing his jingle bells off today as humanity was dealt a massive blow. According to a leaked McDonald’s corporate email, the McRib will not be coming back this Fall. Instead, the fat cats at Mickey D’s are boggarting … Continue reading