One of the greatest things about running this drunk tank of a website, is the TONS of wacky links you freaks send me. From the Rough N Rowdy Bowl, to balcony jumping strippers (RIP Hottie,) my inbox and Facebook feeds always hold ha-ha treasure. Sometimes, … Continue reading
Last year the Frito-Lay company ran a contest that challenged America to create a new potato chip flavor. The lucky entry chosen as the winner would come with an award of ONE MEEELYUN DOLLARS (or a percentage of the new flavor sales, whichever was more.) … Continue reading
I live in a suburb of Houston, Texas. Katy, the land of Alpha Moms and A-Hole Dads. People in these parts are obsessed with suburban perfection and don’t mind going in debt up to their eyeballs just to keep up with … Continue reading
This Thursday marks Valentine’s Day, a holiday cooked up by the card companies in an effort to guilt trip you into buying a bunch of waxy chocolate all in the name of LOVE! In honor of the upcoming holiday, … Continue reading
America’s most famous bloated badger corpse, and resident food network abomination, Guy Fieri bought a vineyard in California’s Sonoma Valley last year. The first batch of Fieri owned Pinot Noir grapes from his vineyard have already been harvested and … Continue reading
Florida, America’s Drunk and Fun Uncle, spent the majority of 2012 gifting the world with various Odd News items. From face-eating bathsalt zombies to sex fights over Pam as a personal lubricant, Florida brought it. Luckily for us, it appears … Continue reading
In case you’re still holed up in a fallout shelter stinking drunk off of your extensive liquor reserves, WE SURVIVED the 2012 version of Y2K, the MAYAN APOCALYPSE!!!! Unfortunately, it seems the fates spared humanity’s wretched existence just to destroy all that is … Continue reading
Pizza Hut, the culinary sandbaggers of the world, have gone and done it again. Once more the company has decided to completely ignore its target market, AMERICA. Canada, our mild neighbors to the north are some lucky SOBs today. In … Continue reading
This past week I’ve been enjoying time on the family ranch, and while the Liberty Longhorn Ranch is still my favorite place on planet Earth, I have to say: I’m thrilled to be home. Scorpions, hormonal women, MORE SCORPIONS, unsuccessful hunting, and a clumsy … Continue reading
Halloween is in less than 48 hours. While children are strategically planning how to get the MOST and BEST candy, tricks are finishing the details on their slutty costumes and boozehounds are getting ready to be blackout drunk. Me? I’m … Continue reading