Once upon a time there was a hilarious, captivating and vainglorious beauty that for half a decade stunk up the internet with toilet humor and accounts of her nefarious dealings. Then the flaming diaper of 2016 happened. That fabled anti-hero is me, The Crib Keeper, AKA Cribsy.
Sadly, doing goody-goody stuff lead me away from writing about nonsense as much as I’d like.
Luckily, y’all are the greatest reader base on the interwebs, even though my 2016 posts were infrequent and often about heavy stuff, you trollups stuck by me and, readership even grew!
While I still have THREE posts left in my Out of Africa series all about Meryl Cribsy’s first African Safari of Love, I promise to take it sleazy this year too. SO without further ado, let’s get this sh*t-show on the road!
Happy 2017 Y’all!
Say Hello to 2017’s First Anthem
Former Louisiana State Representative, Juan LaFonta has bankrolled perhaps the world’s greatest Attorney Commercial, and if you’re a fellow fan of over the top Lawyer ads, you know that’s really saying something. The New Orleans personal injury lawyer teamed up with Bounce music legend Big Freedia to star in an advertisement that can only be described as EXACTLY WHAT THE WORLD NEEDS.
Please, stop whatever the fiddlesticks you are doing and watch this quick slice of pure perfection. GO TO THE BATHROOM AND WATCH IT ON YOUR PHONE IF YOU MUST.
Slow claps, voluptuous vixens in various states of workout dress, a plaid sport coat, this commercial has it all!
Just remember kiddies, when 2017 throws its inevitable punches, just dig in and channel your inner Big Freedia and shout: “JUAN LAFONTA!”
“He fight, he don’t play, he handle yo case. Call the mothaf***er any time of the day!”
(Thanks Dizzy Starlight!)