Your New Best Friend Got On A Plane Yesterday

Yesterday evening, Daniela Velez-Reyes was escorted screaming off of an American Airlines flight from Miami and headed for Chi-Town.

She's a lover AND a fighter!

She’s a lover AND a fighter!


Our new bestie allegedly punched a fellow passenger and required restraining, as she was being held down, Daniela kissed (and then punched) a flight attendant. Once the plane made an emergency landing, the cops escorted this delicate flower of feminine grace off of the plane. Here’s video of her being hauled away, some genius shot the stupid thing it in portrait so you’re just going to have to suffer through:

My guess is somehow Meth is involved because homegirl was flying out of Florida, JUST KIDDING! B*tch was flying from Miami to Chicago, so she was just drunk on Mojitos and fed up with a hater reclining those awful plane chairs into her supple knees. New BFF was just trying to come down off of her Miami Vice, when some a**hole decided to crush her dreams. Ms. Velez-Reyez did what any of us would have done in the same situation, she punched him.

Who could blame her!?

Who could blame her!?


I have to admit, she reached all-star grouchymuffin status when she kissed/hit the flight attendant. I mean, to get so beligerent that a team of people have to contain and restrain your hot mess is already pure class and distinction. However, to then have the brass ovaries to make a move on the sexy Flight Attendant by planting a hastily (and probably slobbery) kiss on them then turn around and hit the kissed flight attendant too? That’s boss-level partying it up right there.

Speaking of drunken tramps taking a walk of shame, I went on a Bachelorette trip this past weekend. I’m not saying Ol’ punchkisspunch would’ve fit right in with us, but let’s just say, Daniela is not the only one that was threatened with jail this week!

Stay Tuned tomorrow (or when my lazy ass gets around to it) for a riveting account of bride-to-be’s, beer, and a whole lot of inappropriate yelling.


Your Pal,




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