Farterland: German Cows Blow Up Barn With Flatulence

When “ripping one,” rips buildings apart.

Fire in the hole!

Fire in the hole!

A farmer in the town of Rasdorf, Germany got a stinky shock when the methane gas produced by his 90 dairy cows blew the roof off his farm shed. The fart attack was caused by built up flatulence in the shed that were eventually ignited by a spark of static electricity. While there’s damage to the building, just one of the cows was injured with only slight burns. Which is good news, though I’m pretty sure the other 89 bovines are scared as f*ck and currently snorting crates of Beano.

Let 'er rip.

Weapons of Ass Destruction

So many fart jokes, so little time! Why, such limited time?My days on this earth are numbered.

See kids, your ol’ pal Cribsy is the Mozart of Farts. Just ask my long-suffering L4L, he’s been threatening to sleep with a gas mask for years. The methane gas build up from all the Taco Bell toots and vodka vrooms emanating from my hind quarters, is asstounding. Simple fact is, the only reason our house is still standing is because we actively avoid open flames.

We're doomed.

We’re doomed.

 

Of course, now that sh*t’s getting real and things are blowing up due to butt trombones, it’s only a matter of time before it’s curtains for yours truly.

When will my buns bomb go off? Your guess is as good as mine. One thing is certain, there will be a trail of glitter, zazz, bad decisions, and an unholy stench, all left in my wake. That’s a legacy I can get behind.

via 

(Thanks, Austin!) 

 


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