I’m going to go on record first and foremost saying, I never in a million years thought that I would be writing a blog post about a child’s kitchen set. In all of my time of writing shoddy sarcasm, never once did I fathom that my musings would sink to these depths of pathetic.
And while I’m fabulously narcissistic, yet far from a loser, here I am. Cashing in all of my cool points to write a post about a Child’s Kitchen set, more importantly, THE Kitchen Set, as in Angry Baby’s newest obsession toy-wise.
First, a history lesson…
When I was a kid, my baby sister had a kitchen set, the toy in particular was the 1987 Fisher Price Fun With Food Kitchen Playset. I tried to find an old-timey Ad for that shiz, but the internets failed me miserably.
Anykitchens, as kids we played with that thing for hours, days at a time. The toy truly was ahead of its time in awesome. While the kitchen was great, it was the food accessories that set the thing off. The cooking playsets were clever, intricate and completely made of plastic. Santa’s fat azz did our clan a solid when he put the Fun with Food Kitchen Set under the tree that year.
Fast forward to now.
Angry Baby is 21 months old. Wow. Time is melting away. But forget the cruel and swift passage of the years, let’s focus on my tiny tyrant instead. My little wrecking ball is in constant motion (as always,) but she’s becoming more “here” and more opinionated for that matter, that’s a tale for later.
Everything is becoming clearer, her movements, personality, speech and even playtime is becoming more sophisticated.
Where she used to just bang crap around for the fun of it, now one can find her at any given moment either lovingly caring for her “Flying Strawberry” or pushing a hotwheel car across the surfaces of the house (complete with vrooming.) Her gameplay has stepped up.
Each time we find ourselves at a house with a Child’s toy kitchen set, Angry Baby makes a beeline for it. Seems she enjoys the culinary arts, well…at least banging and clanging around toy pots and foodstuffs. It became very clear that a toy kitchen set for Angry Baby would be not only developmentally engaging, but would provide potential HOURS of play, AKA time Angry Baby isn’t all up on me like a jungle gym.
The goal was simple, research out the best kitchen set and accessories, so that by Angry Baby’s 2nd birthday, she’d be rockin’ in her new kitchen. After tireless Mommy interviews, and internet review reading, I settled on a kitchen.
Because I always like to get a GREAT deal on big purchases I hit up Amazon, and on a sheer whim decided to troll eBay as well, then by sheer coincidence, I stumbled upon an auction for a tiny piece of the Vintage Fun with Food Kitchen we played with. It was a pot holder.
A tiny little pot holder. The seller wanted $25.00 for it.
I searched eBay for other vintage Fisher Price “Fun with Food” auctions. What I found was shocking. Every piece and accessory that we poured over and played with for hours as children was up for sale on eBay in tiny bits, ALL exorbitantly expensive. I was saddened.
No, not because of industrious, price jacking, eBay opportunists, I was sad because there truly wasn’t a kitchen set out there for Angry Baby today this good. Sorry, Step 2 and Kidcraft, y’all have some good stuff, just not as neato.
In passing, I told my Mom all about the kitchen set saga, complete with the ASTONISHING update about our old Fisher Price Kitchen.
“I kept it, it’s in the Attic.”
You’d think a toy-dork/ Mama Bear like myself would have jumped for joy at the news, especially when you factor in my propensity for HUGE REACTIONS. But I sighed instead.
Even if the “HOLY GRAIL of Kitchen sets were somehow still up in my folks attic after 22 years and a move, surely hurricane Ike and the subsequent direct tornado hit their house took, ruined our childhood treasure long ago. I was skeptical.
“Your brother is coming down to re-duct our A/C, he’ll be in the attic all day Saturday.”
Poor guy, I muttered.
A few days later my Baby Bro and I were talking on our cellular telephones, he was in the 4-hour process of driving to my parents place. I shared the Kitchen Set story complete with Mom’s crazy delusion that it was somehow still intact in their attic. “Hmmm, I’ll be on the look out for it.”
I was dubious. “Hey, don’t knock yourself out, there’s no way in HAIL it survived.”
An hour later, I received this photo from him…
He did it. Miracle of Miracles, this incredible find was found. Oh sure, it was FILTHY, but I know how to use bleach!
As I shared the news with the tiny few that cared, I received another text from my Bro, this one was less clear, and far more filthy…
What I didn’t understand until he brought it here, was this box contained each and every piece of the entire Fisher-Price 1987 Fun with Food Kitchen Set and ALL accessory food play set packs too.
After L4L and I spent a few DAYS cleaning, and generally reclaiming the plastic wonder from dust and decay, we unearthed a near-pristine, complete set.
Because I am a world-class time waster and BARGAIN BRAGGER, meaning I LURVE to get INSANE DEALS on things and then brag endlessly about them, I decided to do a little research on eBay.
The whole entire set as it stands today would easily fetch over $1200.00 if pieced apart and auctioned off to toy collectors. And all it cost me was some sweat, a container of Clorox wipes, 4 rolls of paper towels, a bucket of lysol and a bucket of bleach.
And what about Angry Baby? Am I going to wait 3 months to give her this incredible gift from the past? Nope. Matter of fact, she’s already a kitchen set pro, here she is playing with it now.
Thank you to my Mom and Dad for being nuts enough to 1. Collect the entire set for us when we were kids in the first place and 2. Keep it all these years.
Thanks to Baby Bro for sweating through his clothes to find it.
Thanks to Baby sister for letting Angry Baby use it for the next several years…and most importantly, thanks to L4L for helping me chip away the years of dust, dirt, and attic grime.
Yeah yeah yeah, I know. You’re ticked because I just wasted 10 minutes of your life talking about an 80’s hunk of plastic. But I don’t care. MY SITE, MY RULES, FREEDOM OF SPEECH!!!!!