My brother is having a birthday tomorrow. He thinks since the big day falls on a Saturday this year, he’ll escape birthday embarrassment on this glorious little website.
He’s sorely mistaken.
But that’s tomorrow, not this morning. This morning’s post goes out to him as well, for entirely different reasons.
Growing up, Baby Brother was in love with the movie, Ghostbusters. For his 3rd birthday, the parents purchased him a VHS tape of the film (believe it or not, that was a big deal back then.) My brother proceeded to watch Ghostbusters at least once a day for the next several years, until the tape wore out.
To say this kid was obsessed with Ghostbusters, is an understatement. He had every toy, gadget and piece of merchandise he could get his tiny little hands on. My father even made my bro his very own Ghostbuster jumpsuit, complete with his name stitched in red.
With the news of a 3rd Ghostbusters movie, (sans Bill Murray WTF!?!?!) everything Ghostbusters old is new again, including long defunct Ghostbusters foodstuffs.
Meet Ecto Cooler.
Created in the top-secret labs of the Hi-C beverage company, Ecto cooler made its debut in our fridge the instant it was readily available at the local supermarket.
Here’s a RADICAL (not really) commercial touting it:
For those of you whose parents wouldn’t buy sugar-laden tie-in merchandise, novelty beverages, Ecto Cooler was a triumph. The unholy concoction was a slurry of: high fructose corn syrup, preservatives and so much green food coloring, it resembled a cooling glass of TOXIC WASTE.
You can only imagine how it was received by myself and the siblings. To us, it was the
nectar nECTOr of the Gods.
Unfortunately, like all limited-time children’s soft drinks themed around television and movies, Hi-C axed Ecto Cooler, but not before they re-named the green beverage and continued to sell it under the guise of several other flavor names. The flavor my Baby Bro and I first came to love as Ecto Cooler, officially was discontinued by Hi-C in 2001.
But as I said before, EVERYTHING IS NEW AGAIN Y’ALL! And if there’s one thing the Smurfs movie proved it’s: Children of the 80’s (and 90’s) will shell out BIG BUX for nostalgia. Mark my words my dear, sweet, beloved readers, Once the Ghostbusters 3 marketing machine gets in high gear: Hi-C will re-release Ecto Cooler!
“HAY CRIB KEEPER!”
“What makes you so sure?”
Trust me, I know these things. But that’s a tale for another time.
In the meantime, a group of Ghostbusters die-hards that call themselves, “Ghostbusters Chicago Division” have devoted
hours, weeks, months, years a lot of energy to developing the perfect Ecto Cooler copy. Using several different products, the heroes created a glorious amalgamation that will quench your craving until Hi-C whizzes churns out the real stuff.
Those of you lucky humans who were able to taste the sweet drops
of destiny of Ecto Cooler, are no doubt are rejoicing this fine friday morning.
Dearest Chi-Town Ghostbusting enthusiasts,
Straight from the vault AKA my heart, I SAY: THANK YOU.
Singlehandedly, y’all recreated the most precious and divine liquid since
Andre Extra Dry water.
The Crib Keeper
True Story: Just the other day Baby Bro and I were wishing we had a TALL GLASS of Ecto Cooler to share with Angry Baby. I told him it was “probably for the best that she never taste such an exquisite beverage only to have it cruelly ripped from the grocery shelves of her heart.” He agreed.
No child should ever have to bury their Soft Drink.
But now, the refreshing syrup of my youth is back. And through various specific ingredients, it lives forever.
My beloved, ghost-themed beverage has risen from the dead, like an unholy zombie, that with the proper ingredients and ratios mixed in the correct manner, can live forever (vampire-style.) Happy 2nd day of the Halloween Season!
Bonus Tip: If you drop what you’re doing and devote the rest of the workday to procuring and marrying these ingredients, you’ll have a batch ready by the weekend!!!!!
This one goes out to the Baby Bro! Don’t think I’m not going to
embarass celebrate you on your birthday, I AM! -CK