Say Hello to the GREATEST TELEVISION SHOW EVER!

Make Moustaches and War.

Tonight, on the IFC channel, a television series premieres. A show that will rock your faces off with sheer mustachioed glory.

Whisker Wars!!!!!!

It’s all about facial hair competition. The show is done by Thom Beers, the same dude who does Deadliest Catch. So you know it’s gonna be good. Wouldn’t it be great if Mike Rowe did the voiceovers for this show?

His powerful voice perfectly narrating, making everything sound tough and important.

“Buford has been growing his facial shag carpet for 17 years, he gets up at 4 am every morning to rub his beard with fine liniments.”

Anybabies, I went off on a bit of a tangent there. Sorry I’m a Deadliest Catch fan (RIP Cap’n Phil.) Although there were a few seasons where I called it “Deadliest Kvetch.”

And double apologies to those of you too busy watching Judge Judy, to know what Deadliest Catch is.

Thom Beers is a genius  he knows exactly what I, The Crib Keeper, want to see on my television.

1. Tough dudes doing tough stuff in the ocean.

2. Incredible facial hair competitions and those who enter them.

This imaginary Mimosa is for YOU Thom Beers, you’re sure to have your newest SMASH HIT with WHISKER WARS!!!!!!!!!!!

Tune in tonight those of you that get the IFC channel, those of you too cool for TV, I’m sure the internet will have it for your perusal sometime over the weekend.

Here’s an extra long and luxurious trailer.

 


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