I noticed Angry Baby took an unusually long nap this morning, I dismissed it as a possible growth spurt that is due any minit. In the back of my mind, I thought: keep an eye out for anything unusual with the kiddo. When she awoke, I picked her up for NUM NUMS and noticed she was warm.
Lunchtime feeding came and ended with a whimper after 20 minutes out of bed, she was still warm, actually: I could sizzle an egg on her generous forehead, she was HOT. I reached for my temporal scan thermometer, AKA expensive piece of crap. It read everything from 99.00 to 103.8
I decided to go where many mom’s have gone, I took her temperature with a digital thermometer, rectally. It was mine and Angry Baby’s first foray into the bootay. She didn’t fight me, my panic soared.
This is the time where I fill you in on a coupla facts: Angry Baby has never been sick. Repeat, never been sick. See, your ol’ pal the Crib Keeper almost kicked the bucket having Angry Baby, and suffered some gnarly complications that continued until just a month or so ago. Because of this, I was only allowed by my medical team to breast-feed for a month. The month that she did get milk from me, it was a max of 4 oz a day as I was too sick for my milk to ever truly come in. With all the lactation supplements and meds, 4 oz was it. Add the fact that my antibodies were fighting massive infection 24-7 and I was on every cutting edge antibiotic available to modern medicine: IV’s, Shots, Pills…the small daily amount of my milk she did get was EXTREME Immune building milk. End result: Angry Baby’s immune system is made of steel, she drop-kicks sickness and repells all things ill. Until today.
Back to the booty: for what seemed like an eternity, the thermometer ticked, it passed 100, I started secretly pleading with it to STOP GOING UP! I was like a contestant on the most pathetic gameshow ever. 101- CRAP! This is awful. 102- I get my phone out of my pocket and start dialing her pediatrician, 103.4 is where it finally stopped. I was on the phone with the Doctor’s office when it beeped done.
They had me leave a message for the Nurse, I fought everything in my nasty nature to not start screaming at the receptionist: DON’T YOU KNOW HOW SERIOUS A 103.4 FEVER IS!?!?!?!?! Instead, I calmly gave her my details and stressed to her that I was stressed…REAL TALK: IT WAS A BLIND FREAKING PANIC!
As I waited for a call back, I held my screaming wet little noodle, and felt my heart break into a million pieces, who should I call? My Mom? Only to have her panic and leave a classroom full of hooligans to plunder the school as she ran to our aid? How ’bout Lover fo’ Life? should I make his already stressful day worse by saying: “HAY! Our kid is sizzling like bacon, have fun in all those meetings worrying if she (and I) are ok!” I settled on not calling anyone in the interest of keeping my line free and clear (yes, I know all cellphones have call waiting, but I don’t trust it in emergencies!)
As the minutes crept past, I swore on my child’s little limp pinky that if the pediatrician didn’t call me in 15 minutes or less, I was going to walk in and take a dump on the front desk ON MY WAY to a new pediatrician. They called back in 5 minutes.
I had baby Tylenol already on the fever reducing tip, but the Nurse Maria, said I also needed children’s motrin, and to alternate. Turns out children’s motrin works best for higher fevers! I learn something new everyday. If she isn’t doing better in a few hours, they told me to bring her in.
Armed with a naked (except diaper) baby and a wild determination to fix my child’s fever, we (safely) rushed down to the pharmacy, and procured a bottle of Advil’s finest.
As I write this her temperature is 101 and falling. She’s taking a nap, and seems much more relaxed. Angry Baby was awake playing with her fingers just a few minutes ago (she’s very into fingerplay these days.) SO hopefully, we are on the trail. She’s not coughing, no drainage, she IS grabbing at her ears when she screams, but she always grabs her ears when she is mad. I am vigilant on all fronts. Cold, Ear Infection, random fever spike incident, whatever it is I’M ON IT.
I promised you dear reader, I wouldn’t varnish anything. Here I am, fevers, panic and all. I know most parents have this scare MUCH earlier than 7 months, so I guess I can say I earned another whisker of MOM CHOPS today. Even with noticing immediately and doing everything I possibly can for this hot tamale of an Angry baby, I can’t help but feel terrible.
Perhaps, it is just the po-part (aka postpartum)of me, but I have a heavy feeling of guilt on a primal level. It sits in the same cubicle as my mother’s intuition. It’s telling me:”YOU should have done something to prevent this fever!” Maybe I should have checked her temperature when I first noticed she was taking a longer nap than usual. I can’t beat myself up about it, but I can’t pretend to be zippy and excited that I have a sizzling muffin, even if sizzling does remind me of bacon, nature’s candy. I’ll keep you posted, and I’d love to hear your tales of THE HEAT IS ON (kid fevers), if’n you’d like to share.
Thanks for reading, as always.
The Crib Keeper