Happy Friday LATE AFTERNOON! You’re almost done! How was your first workweek shirking job responsibilities at Grouchymuffin.com? I, for one have had a BLAST!
Thank you from the bottom of MY tinyshriveledfilledwithviscousblackfluidinlieuofblood HEART. Before you skeedadle out the door/start the end of day baby wrangling/ go back to watching Judge Judy, I wanted to remind you: during this weekend crammed with crowded restaurants, maccaroni heart necklaces, and near knife-fites at the greeting card aisle*….
*Hardly an Aisle at this point, it’s been picked of all the GOOD mother’s day cards. You’ll have to settle for the sCRAPs.
Dad’s exist too.
I think it says something about our world that when I typed “Dad h” into google search, “Dad hit in the nuts” is the first thing that came up. No, “Dad hugs child, dad has an awesome surprise, dad hates vegetables”…none of that nonsense. Just straight to the cojones. FYI: “Dad hit in BALLS,” was the #2 suggestion.
Yeah, yeah…I know they have a whole holiday to themselves, but you know what? THAT DAY IS USUALLY A KICK IN THE PILLSBERRIES TOO!
Typical father’s day: Wake up at 7:00am (Dad has to take you to a game or church group or to your probation officer, etc.) Dad comes back asks what’s for breakfast only to be told the crew is counting on his “FAMOUS DAD PANCAKES”(cookedbydad) While Dad cooks the FAMOUS PANCAKES the rest-o you miserable jerks dig through your drawers for a hastily assembled craft to pass off as a thoughtfully created piece of love. Mom quickly has you scrawl a ‘LOVE YA POPS!’ on a card and whispers, “don’t worry guys, got it covered” she pulls out a beautifully wrapped tie box. You all gather arround for a quick: “you rule Dude!” He opens his TIE (ugh, AGAIN!?)… Everyone scatters to the four winds immediately afterwards, and the Day usually ends with Dad getting to(!) grill. Woo Hoo.
Way to go Dad, here’s some crap you don’t use and have too much of already, (can I have a 20 spot for gas?) WE’RE STARVING!
Dad’s one special(!) day, will culminate in him standing over a fire sweating his Nuts or Balls(#2) Off.
So Have a GREAT MOTHER’S DAY WEEKEND, but throw Dear ol’ dad a crumb.
That being said: ENJOY SOME NUT SHOT VIDEOS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Thanks for the Biebs, A-Ball)
(Welcome to Parenthood! Greg N.)
Besides GrandAngry Baby thinks he’s the greatest thing since num nums.